- The Chemistry Guy
- The Chemistry of everyday life, an HIV blogger. Twitter: @tcghiv | Email: tetrahydroziline@gmail.com
2 in 24
In a span of 24 hours, I saw 2 of my exes.
First. He was riding a cab passed right through me. Not a big deal though.
Second. It was break time and I decided to have something to eat from a nearby 7-11 store.
Across the street was this building of a major Telco company. He was there waiting for a cab.
And in all fairness, he looked good than before. Nice matching colored hair, lost wait and improved get up.
I wondered, maybe I won't get infected if only we sticked together.
My Promiscuity pt.1
I just wanna share some experiences..
This was roughly 4 years ago. I met this guy from a famous gay social networking site. G4M.
I know he was just into sex since he was not really that sensible to talk to. Weeks have passed and he was very insistent in meeting me. I was about to leave my office - Ortigas area. When he texted, very persistent to drop by "his" apartment located in Pasong Tamo. Since located naman sya along the way, napilit din nya ko.
We met at this nearby Mcdonalds and went straight sa so-called apartment nya. I was a bit doubtful so I asked,
Magisa ka lang ba sa bahay mo?
... Hindi, kasama ko mga friends ko.
So, looking to that answer.. kinabahan na ko. Hindi naman kasi ako sanay na makipag-meet to another guy pag may kasamang iba or other 3rd wheel. Point of no return, nag decided na ko tumuloy.
Going straight to bedroom, pag bukas nya ng pintuan.. May nakahiga ng guy. Akala ko bedspacer. Pero to my surprise, that was his bedroom. I was stunned. 3some ito. Shet.
Wala na ko magawa, we went to start this so-called fun of his when they said na...
Si xxx nasa bathroom pa. Hintayin pa natin.
What the fuck, so it's not 3some. 4some pala. The boyfriend of the bedroom owner.
Wala na ko magawa. The thing happened and started as expected. Goodness gracious, gusto pa nila ako i-bottom. Pila balde. As far as I can remember hindi naman ako fuck doll. Pinipilit nila ibuka yung mga legs ko and apply this smelly lubricant. I insisted, ayoko talaga.. They looked panget and not really good looking. Matured and seemed like callboy appeal. Ehhh. No. Basta, No.
Para matapos lang, I did my stuff and finished my course para wala na.
After 15mins I hurriedly packed my things at nilayasan ko na sila.
After a while, I learned from a friend that these guys do this every now and then. Invite someone to that apartment without knowing this 4some happening. They do it every Thursday. I don't know what's with that solemn day. Well, for sure one of them might have HIV na. Especially the guy who invited me.
This won't ever happen again.
Movie glance: Priest 3D
Full of expectations, The movie was a bit disappointing.
Fight scenes were good but of small quantity. Can easily anticipate the storyline. I guess a possible sequel.
A must see fight scene was the Rope Dart with Maggie Q.
It's a so-so movie. Not really worth the 3D pay. Just try to see it on 2D or the normal screen.
Not at Par
Feeling is not really good recently. Too many anxieties to deal with. Can't concentrate properly, stressed and pressured. I just wanna dive in an ice-cold swimming pool.
I just had a photo shoot opportunity held by an annual bikini summit. I think I did well. But photos were not included. Disappointed and frustrated. Though I still owe the agency a gratitude for giving me the chance. Maybe I need to practice more editorial shots. What will those people whom I've worked with say? That's what I am anxious about.
My pet companion is severely ill. She's not feeling well and it seems that she's on the brink of giving up. I had her just a few months back and like what I always do, I invest emotions onto something if I know it's worth investing for. As of now, it may sound silly, but I'm crying over my feline friend. Going home and opening the door, seeing her meowing and waiting for me. Waking me up as she licks my fingers. It's really hard and depressing for such possible loss.
Birthday is about less than a month. Nothing to celebrate about, just the thing that today I'm still alive. Pretty much that's it.
Do those test really tell that I'm depressed? Am trying to cope with this but it seems I am having a hard time.
I think I can no longer do this alone.
A self-assessment
I took some Depression tests online.
Result 2:
Result 3:
They are just one and the same.
Result 1:
You answered 9 items out of 10 "Yes". According to The National Mental Health Association, 5 or more yes answers indicates that you may be suffering from clinical depression.
Here's your score:Your score is = 21
Scores of 1-10 Normal
Scores of 11-14 Normal Life Mood
Scores of 15-20 Headed Towards Depression
Scores of 21-25 Mild Depression
Scores of 26-30 Moderate Depression
Scores of Over 31 Severe Depression
If your score is in the mild, moderate, or severe range talk to a counselor or your doctor. Please visit other sections of this web site for helpful information on coping with depression.
Result 3:
They are just one and the same.
See the Sunlight
Sunsets are one of the greatest times to shoot. The Golden hour of the day.
Exif data:
Aperture: f11
Shutter Speed: 1/350 second
ISO: 200
Exposure Bias: 0
Metering: Center Weighted
Focal Length: 50mm
Frustration
I think I'll quit Portrait photography. Nothing is really happening. I think I am trying to hard.
I really hope to be a magazine photographer. But the thing is... it's not right on track.
I have models - I don't have location
I have location - I don't have models
I have a shoot - I don't have the equipment
I have the equipment - I don't have shoot
I have all - I don't have the chance
Really frustrating. I think I need to go back to Landscape. Chance is not not giving me to improve and hone my skills. Heartbreaking. All I do is just stare at those high fashion magazines, eating my heart out.
My portrait lens was just a waste. It seems I need to sell this and buy an Ultra-Wide angle one.
I'm depressed.
I really hope to be a magazine photographer. But the thing is... it's not right on track.
I have models - I don't have location
I have location - I don't have models
I have a shoot - I don't have the equipment
I have the equipment - I don't have shoot
I have all - I don't have the chance
Really frustrating. I think I need to go back to Landscape. Chance is not not giving me to improve and hone my skills. Heartbreaking. All I do is just stare at those high fashion magazines, eating my heart out.
My portrait lens was just a waste. It seems I need to sell this and buy an Ultra-Wide angle one.
I'm depressed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
