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The Chemistry of everyday life, an HIV blogger. Twitter: @tcghiv | Email: tetrahydroziline@gmail.com

Quarter-life Crisis and Insecurity

I'm 26 and I can say I'm running on this quarter life crisis.

Let's try to define quarter life crisis:

As per Wikipedia,

"The quarter-life crisis is a period of life following the major changes of adolescence, usually ranging from the late teens to the early thirties, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult."

As of the time being, I don't know where I'm leading to. Feels that I lack identity or something that can be associated with me.

Still contemplating of why at this point of my life, I haven't reached something. If you were to ask me what's my greatest achievement to date... I can't think of any.

The least that I can relate to was I managed to finish college while working. Yeah, I was a working student way back. Struggled between the schedule of work, school, sleep and social being.

Another is, I'm working for one of the known software companies. Prolly, you have use one of its products. But not really, it's too early to tell and I can't write something on a hard stone since my mind is still at unease. Still at the "associate" level. That is.

The reason why I'm feeling all these is maybe because I'm putting too much pressure to myself. Pressure that is caused by being surrounded with successful people at this early stage of life.

I browsed my Facebook friends the other week and checked their status, profiles and information. Nearly all of them, if not, most of them are on their "peak" careers.

Perhaps this is an envious approach from my perspective and I admit it. I know it's too early for this melodrama of some shit but it's just how the way I feel. Of course, I can't keep it... hence this blog post.

There's a strong emergence that I lack identity or any association that can be related to myself.

If you hear the name "the chemistry guy"... not much importance or something that will stick to your mind.

I'm starting to get tired of being an observant kind of guy, it keeps me staring and thinking for something that somebody has which I don't have.. I'm lacking of a thing that I can be proud of.

These two - quarter life crisis and insecurity are a perfect combination that adds up to the depression that is currently building up on my end.

A solution I'm trying to find is, how to battle these out, maybe just go with flow? or let it pass - "this too shall pass"? or try to compete with those who already have established their own?

It may sound that this post reflects me as something or somewhat... I don't care, I assume this is better than me keeping what I really feel.

As of now, I'm just tired of planning and contemplating. I want a life where I can't feel anything nor think of anything.

This issue has been with me for the past months, maybe early 2012. I just pray that sooner or later this will fade away.

Still trying to see the bright side.

Follow me on Twitter: @tcghiv

1 comments:

mhigs876 { Monday, October 22, 2012 at 7:31:00 PM GMT+8 }
hi there. A newbie here.. one month more or less. I just started reading your blog and so far I really like it. Hope to meet you in person someday to somehow share some insights and experiences. This is my e add: mhigs876@gmail.com